Non academic long post :
( Getting off my chest post )
Just saw someone asking about prospects & possibilities of marrying at 32-33 for a guy.
That triggered chain of thoughts inside my head too. Not that I haven’t been overthinking about it lately.
I’m 26M who just got General surgery this year.
I used to think that I’m such a nice, loving and caring guy, I’ll definitely find a girl with a beautiful heart falling in love with me someday.
Sadly I’ve never had any luck in dating anyone and the girl I had huge huge crush on , crushed my feelings and rejected me twice
(yeah I know : where was my self respect ?)
She sweetly said no both the times and we were still friends, which hurt me even more and I cried for almost 3 years listening to sad songs & day dreaming. ( Yes Men cry too) but What a pathetic loser I was ,I realise that now, the time & emotions I wasted running after someone who didn’t give a damn about me infuriates me so much.
Later there were couple of girls that I liked they also rejected my advances.
‘You are such a sweet person yaar, and I’m sure you’ll find someone good in your life’
That’s what I get in return.
I started thinking I was just not good enough for anyone, that I wasn’t likeable or loveable. It crushes you from within knowing that no one out there wants you.
& When you go through so much and come out on the other side , you not just go through that , you really grow through that. Cliche much ?
Just like that I learned so many lessons in my life while growing through all that.
-Now I understand that I am capable of making myself happy on my own and Sure someone’s presence will aid in that but their absence surely doesn’t mean i should be sad and miserable.
- Before needing someone else’s love I’ll love myself.
I’ll choose myself before I start chasing random people in my life.
- I realised that I am loveable , it’s just that real life isn’t like a movie. Things are different here and they don’t always go as planned. So I’ll have to be patient, may be I’ll find the right one or may be not. Nobody knows.
What I do know is even if that happens, I’ll be able to spend my life happily on my own.
Because you can’t force people to like you, you just gotta let go.
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Am I afraid to be alone ? Hell no, I’ll earn and spend my money on me , I’ll travel this beautiful planet and enjoy every second of it.
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I am enough and more importantly I am iron man
Peace out
Keep working on your goals,life, career …things will align when they’re meant to
Iron man but no courage to post from original I’d