Posting this on behalf of a friend who wants to stay anonymous.
Long post…
I was pretty good at my studies, even scored 70% in my 1st year mbbs exams…
During 2 nd year I went into depression, started hating everything about myself, everyday, every second of my life felt like a torture, I had no one to talk about this, I used to feel this extreme pressure as if something is about to explode in my head… cried everyday, felt so lost and hopeless
Somehow managed to pass exams…
It took me 2 years to come out of this feeling (with a lot of effort)… I felt normal again, my entire personality changed, I felt confidant about myself…
But I had lost track of my studies… I knew it would be difficult.
I felt I can no longer learn things as I used to do…
My memory, comprehensive ability, logic, aptitude everything became so low…
I had to put extra effort even to learn basic easiest stuff… and I would forget that so easily… I studied like hell and cleared my final year exams…
But I know I don’t know anything, my basics are so bad, it feels like I am a mentally retarded /dumb person who cannot learn the easiest of concept…
I still remember whatever I had learnt during my 1st year, pu, high school.
But now no matter how much I try, I am not able to get facts, not able to connect between different topics, and I have a very weak memory…
I get frequent panic attacks thinking about what I am going to do in life, like even as an MBBS doc, I will not be able to analyse and treat patients… it always kills me that I lack knowledge. I don’t know how to proceed.
kindly guide me, I am ready to do anything to become efficient.
U just need a little bit of patience cz most of ur bad times are already over as u cmin out of ur shell pretty strong. Being vocal abt ur bad times is like overcoming the most crucial hurdle. Stay strong n positive. Start meditation rather than thinking abt starting on medication. But yeah if nothing works by urself, do visit a doctor.
Please consult a psychologist for counselling. Mental Disorders are commonly ignored in india, unlike in western countries. It seems you are having some psychological issues for quite a few years. You can’t treat yourselves.
It’s also very unsafe for you as well as your patients (as yourself is confused how can you give proper advice to them).
I strongly advice your friend to discuss with a career counsellor as well to see whether he/she like the medical field or are more interested in other fields.
It’s never late to reassess your decisions and plans that may affect your future.
Learn any musical instrument. It will help you to concentrate on important elements, helps you come out of depression.